Rachy

Gah fuck.

2007-01-09T06:16:54Z

It's amazing how little things can bring back such shitty memories. I've come to terms that I have a hard time of letting go of the past, and that almost anything can upset me. I dunno what to do anymore. I don't know what I want. I can only narrow down the things I don't want. Oh and I push away the only people who probably give a shit about me so I really dun have many friends now. Blah blah blah. Bitch bitch bitch. I thought writing in a journal was supposed to make you feel better or soemthing? shits gay. i wanna kill something. hopefully a person. now i have a pussy on my lap and he's happy. that would be awesome to be a cat. sleep piss shit eat play. repeat. now i'm rambling and i don't know what i'm talking about.

effin shit. bitch. cock. cunt.

=)

a_winter_rose @ 2006-05-21T16:38:00

2006-05-21T20:41:05Z

i wish i could stop feeling and sleeping..

emotions can be a pain in the ass sometimes

a_winter_rose @ 2006-04-23T09:56:00

2006-04-23T14:09:10Z

well i'm home from germany

it was fun but exhausting

and i just turned 18

um that's about it

a_winter_rose @ 2006-04-10T06:41:00

2006-04-10T10:51:19Z

my dad locked his bedroom door and his girlfriend is in there

so is my toothbrush, toothpaste, shampoo, conditioner, and body wash

we share the same bathroom

how fucked up

a_winter_rose @ 2006-03-10T04:43:00

2006-03-10T09:46:55Z

I just had an awful zombie dream. I haven't had a bad dream for sooo long. Fuck I'm still so panicy. It was so vivid. I'm actually scared to go back to bed. There's no one on for comfort. I dunno what to do. I think i'ma just cry right now haha.

FUCK! I hate zombies.

I need to stop watching soo many movies

a_winter_rose @ 2006-02-03T07:04:00

2006-02-03T12:08:44Z

I fucking love naps. I'm a nap fiend. I just take naps throughout the day and even when I sleep before school it's really just a nap. Last night I only slept for an hour and a half.. and it was fantastic.

Also.. my cat drools. He bites. He licks. Don't dogs do that shit?

a_winter_rose @ 2005-12-25T14:11:00

2005-12-25T19:11:57Z

I like how families turn into flaming assholes on christmas/hanukah. I was enjoying the holiday season until today.

a_winter_rose @ 2005-11-13T02:08:00

2005-11-13T07:09:44Z

Apparently while I was at work we got carpet in the hallway. I didn't know about it. No one told me. That was a weird surprize. Now the dog can piss all over it!

a_winter_rose @ 2005-10-29T00:23:00

2005-10-29T04:24:15Z

I have my outfit. God loves me. =P

a_winter_rose @ 2005-10-15T01:50:00

2005-10-15T05:52:01Z

"Do you want the rest of mine (slim jim)?" "It's already been tainted by someone else's joy."

a_winter_rose @ 2005-10-10T21:19:00

2005-10-11T01:19:47Z

Franken Weiner

a_winter_rose @ 2005-10-02T12:08:00

2005-10-02T16:09:24Z

I've never seen what a pitbull could do to another dog until now. Midnight got fuuuuucked up. She got all bit up and it ended up getting a lil infected so we took her to the vet. They stiched up a bunch of bites on the back of her neck and it's all shaved. They always put two draining tubes in the back of her neck. They also put a morphine patch on her side because she's in pain. So she's acting real funky. Pitbulls suck.

a_winter_rose @ 2005-09-25T00:16:00

2005-09-25T04:21:30Z

I never thought that me offering people to have a party and no one wanting to come would ever happen. I feel real loved right about now. Fuck you. Everyone who makes me feel like a worthless piece of shit.

My eyes hurt.

My chest is heavy.

Would anyone even give a shit if I were six feet underground? I don't really think so.

a_winter_rose @ 2005-09-14T01:07:00

2005-09-14T05:11:16Z

I've come to a conclusion. I can't be alone. I always feel the need to be cared for and loved. If I'm not, I'm miserable. Someone love me! heh..

Well holy shit.. an update.

2005-09-01T06:02:29Z

I haven't done this in a long time. I really haven't felt like venting through this. I've just been taking it out on other people. Mmm coacoa puffs. Anyway, i've been feeling pretty shitty lately. Just nothing has been going right. I'm looking forward to being completely destroyed starting friday till school starts..cause then i won't feel like this. Gah this sucks. I'm shutting up now.

a_winter_rose @ 2005-07-26T01:59:00

2005-07-26T06:01:30Z

Why is it whenever I need someone.. no one is there? I don't think it's gonna change. I'm so tired but I can't sleep. I'm gonna try again.

I hate everything.

And I don't like you..

a_winter_rose @ 2005-07-10T20:10:00

2005-07-11T00:13:03Z

I have strep throat.. during the summer. This is gay. I had to go to the hospital to get antibiotics and they gave me a cortizone shot. Haha and i threw up. My fever won't go away. This sucks. All i wanna do is work.. i would tell people to come visit me but that's a real bad idea. Oh and some little girl that was like 4 or 5 had a huge splinter from the boardwalk.. moral of that is don't walk barefoot on the boardwalk or you'll end up screaming so people can hear you down the hallway =P

fuck i wanna get better

this shoulda happened while i was in school

a_winter_rose @ 2005-06-18T12:08:00

2005-06-18T16:30:27Z

Hey. Yo. La. Ok.. I just feel like ranting a little. I'm so confused. Too much shit goin on again. Too many people bein dicks. So everyone who thinks i'm a bitch.. then fuck you. Only way i'm ever mean to someone is if you dick me over first. I can name many people who have and i end up forgiving most of them. Unless you keep screwin me over. Then I need to prove something. Don't fuck with me. I have enough to deal with besides your petty ass highschool bullshit.

For the people that are awesome.. for those who come back to me after fights and we forgive each other and forget about that stupid bullshit. I love ya guys. I should just start listing everyone =P Like Chloe, Elise, Jared, Rachel, and Tanky. There's probably others I'm forgetting. Haha like MATT! Stupid nigga. It's nice to know not everyone in the world sucks.. that's a lot of people that I'm able to list.. and I'm glad about that. I'm not forgetting Nate. He has an oversized heart.=P(it isn't a bad thing.. it's awesome) Anytime he does something wrong he feels bad about it in like two seconds. It's cute hehe.

Working at the movie theater is sweet. Everyone is nice and friendly there. Also I get to see awesome free movies =P LIKE Land of the DEAD! DUN DUN DUN! I can't wiat for that shit. Except one kid doesn't think my boobies are BIG!! ISN'T THAT GAY!? Haha. I know your reading this Chris. You crazy LJ stalker =P JUST PLAYIN!!!

Aight. I'm done. That's enough. I dun feel better for this rant.. I just hope the people that have problems with me just fucking drop it and forget it.

WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!

a_winter_rose @ 2005-06-15T23:04:00

2005-06-16T03:05:31Z

When was the last time anyone listened to Alien Ant Farm? Haha I missed this guys.

a_winter_rose @ 2005-06-07T01:46:00

2005-06-07T05:52:03Z

I can't sleep. I can't sleep. I can't sleep. I can't sleep. I can't sleep. I can't sleep I can't sleep I can't sleep I can't sleep I can't sleep I can't sleep I can't sleep I can't sleep. Yea I can't sleep. This sucks. School is gonna really suck tomorrow. My head doesn't want to stop thinkin about unpleasant things. So even if I do fall asleep. I'll probably have a nightmare. No one else is awake. I wish there was someone I could talk to. I dunno why I feel down. I had a good weekend. I want to get drunk.. definitely going to this friday.. I'm tired of being sober. Maybe that's why I'm so crabby. I haven't gotten drunk in a while. Time to lay in bed again. If anyone stays up late.. come online.. I'll probably do this tomorrow night too.

a_winter_rose @ 2005-05-30T23:32:00

2005-05-31T03:43:45Z

Right now I really don't want to be alone.. I want to be with Nate.. I just all of a sudden started to feel really lonely. I miss him. I want to be able to fall asleep with him every night.. I'm tired of living here. I want to be somewhere else. Ha I'm being selfish but I don't think Nate would mind heh.. I'm just in one of those moods where I could bury my head into his chest and sleep all night and day.. It'd feel better than this. Being strong is becoming harder.. I kinda feel like breaking down.. goin nuts. Ah well. I dun really know what to do with myself. This is a pretty dumb rant but it makes me feel better. I don't have really many people to talk to.. The one person I do talk to I just end up making sad with all this crap. I hope things get better. I hope I get out of this miserable house. I hope I end up spending the rest of my life with this one boy. Too bad I don't have much faith in anything..

a_winter_rose @ 2005-05-30T02:08:00

2005-05-30T06:12:10Z

I am gonna beat the crap outta my brother and his girlfriend. >=/

a_winter_rose @ 2005-05-23T22:52:00

2005-05-24T02:54:56Z

Ok. Someone should seriously let me move in with them. Anyone want a small sized Rachy? She doesn't eat much. She fits in small spaces. She'll cuddle and likes to be pet. AND SHE'S FREE. If anyone is interested in Rachy please contact me =P

a_winter_rose @ 2005-05-22T22:43:00

2005-05-23T02:45:28Z

Does anyone want to get an apartment or condo with my mom and me? I'm dead serious about this. We can't afford it by ourselves. If anyone is at all interested and well 18 years of age please let me know.. Call me or comment or IM me. Anything. Thanks..

I hate people.

2005-05-17T02:15:02Z

I saw some asshole in a truck today hit a cat. The person could have avoided it by slowing down since no one was behind them, or could have moved to the side a bit. I cried. I'm a pansy. I love animals though.. I want to kill that person in the truck. People suck.